One Binder To Bind Them All


So, I was kind of panicking last night about the upcoming audition we’re holding for my short film, S________ for the S__. I wasn’t feeling very prepared.

So that’s when I reached for the 3-ring binder. This one little stupid object makes me feel so much better about the film — more organized, more in control. Now I can break this large project into more digestible pieces.

I have separators in my binder. Script! Schedule! Budget! Cast/Crew! Props! Camera!

I have a brand new lefty spiral notebook in my binder, that I swiped from MizSplotchy. I have Post-Its. I have pens.

I am so ready.

Who’s Ready For Some More ROT13ed Swear Words? I Sure As Fuvggvat Am!

We started this fun here. Let’s continue the joy and love!

I’ll repeat the verbiage from my original post, for those who have forgotten the spiel.

A list of ROT13-encoded swear words.

Pop them in the Input box of the ROT13 Decoder to the right and hit the “En/Decode input” button. I personally prefer decoding the words one at a time, as that adds to the excitement and sexual tension.

I suppose you could try guessing them first, if that’s your inclination, but this post is more about the swearing than the quizzing.

1. shpxjvg
2. ternfl-nffrq tbbq-sbe-abguvat zbaxrl gvgf
3. Bu, pbpx!
4. shpx-n-qhpx
5. V tbg gur fybccl fuvgf
6. gvtug cnagf jrnevat zbaxrlsvatrerq pbecfrshpxre
7. qvegl onyyf fhpxvat wrexbss
8. fcbbtr-jenatyre
9. cvff ba lbhefrys, nffgbnq
10. hShpx

Blogs Are No Good For Sneakiness

I know blogs are websites moving through time. I know this.

And posts are more disposable than some old-skool webpage from the mid-90’s. Those pages had permanence, baby.

This is an alert to you, dear readers. I am occasionally sneaky.

Like Sweet, Sweet Empty Space.

Looks empty, don’t it?

It’s not. Press your mouse button down and drag your mouse across the Empty Space post. I like doing stupid stuff like this. Now, I don’t know if people didn’t figure out my sneaky attempt, or they just found my attempt not particularly sneaky or interesting. I would prefer to think the former — after all, Manx, the only person who answered my questions, had to be prodded with a sharp stick to notice the text.

So, this is me telling you, all out in the open and stuff, blatant, explicit.

I AM SNEAKY. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

I try to make this blog fun, and having the occasional easter eggs for my readers is just another fun thing (to me, at least).

Wow, it’s been months since I did that “Sweet, Sweet Empty Space” post. I reckon I’m probably due for another bout of sneaking. Or maybe I just did one.

?

For Those Who Can Find It

Ahhh.

Vacation. For my family, but not for me, unfortunately.
Every student and teacher looks forward to the
return of warm weather, because it signifies that the school
year is at an end.

So, what then? Should I be like everyone
else in the workforce, working summer months? Or
could I make it as a teacher? Could I shoulder the
responsibility of attempting to impart knowledge to
eager minds, or minds eager to do anything but
tests and quizzes?

My mother was a teacher, giving junior high kids an art
education. But I can’t teach art. I’d like to teach
magic, or trickery, scavenger hunts, puzzles with
elaborate clues. But can I find a job that pays me for that?

Let’s say that I would turn out to be good teacher,
or that I was passable. Let’s say I taught puzzles, or tricks
of language. The problem would be the next class.
Kids taking my class would have the answers to my questions.

Returning students could simply pass these questions, which
I labored over, to the next batch of students. It wouldn’t be
Geography or Math, which is something relatively fixed, and
having relatively firm rules to base my teaching on. But
teaching tricks? Perhaps they’re better done for fun.

Famous Last Lines To Movies Yet To Be Written

01. “Grab the hammer and the turkey baster. We’re going to Vegas.”

02. “Reginald, this is your chewing gum talking. Now listen very carefully…”

03. “We are the invasive species!”

04. “Ummmmmmmm… Infinity?”

05. “Mr. Johnson is dead and would like a word with you.”

06. “If you ever need any spare body parts, you know where to find me.”

07. “Oh, fistyloofing crumbcakes!”

08. “She was my giraffe and she always will be.”

09. “Everybody do the shimmy!”

10. “That’s the end of that. Or is it?”

Celebrity Audio Poll Closed

My recent poll has ended.

The readers of I, Splotchy have spoken.

It’s a tie between Morgan Freeman and Jennifer Tilly.

I will attempt to contact their representation to inquire about hiring them to do some audio work for this blog.

Thanks to everyone who voted.